Was it a bad dream?
This frigid morning out in Cheam.
An important game and not a lark,
This match between Nuns and the mighty Ark.
Bad news for Nuns at the outset
As their back line wasn’t present
So on which side to bet
was like trying to shoot a flying pheasant.
But the game started with a rejigged team,
Yoda said ‘attacking heavy, they seem’.
NUNS 15-11 ARK
Taking a slender lead,
Perspiration started to bead
With no-one usual at the back,
All over the court was pure attack.
Interceptions here and there
Lozza was marshalling the troops like a ferocious bear.
Communication was vital
In case different parts of the team went tribal.
But scoring regularly the Nuns took charge
Without a single aggressive shoulder barge
Now possessing a decent lead,
The Nuns were now looking forward to an orange feed.
NUNS 33-21 ARK
“We shall fight them in the semi circles, we shall fight them in every third, we shall fight them to the basket – we never surrender”
While leading after the first half,
Joan was worried some nuns already wanted a bath;
So she gave a rousing call,
For each one to keep giving their all.
And by gum they did that,
Every nun pouncing on the ball like a fevered cat.
Suze and Apples in the zone,
scoring goals at every chance;
Not even throwing Ark a bone,
Leading them a merry dance.
But it was not all easy
Their shooter with aim so true,
Marisa debuting at keeper
Part of an improv back line that managed to leave Ark feeling blue.
They powered ahead,
Winning the quarter by another four;
Nearly putting the game to bed,
But more would be required to fully close the door.
NUNS 49-33 ARK
“Ask not what your Nuns can do for you, ask what you can do for your Nuns”
Nuns were fighting for everything tough and fair.
Leaping like salmon up the stream,
Some moves were working like a dream.
A couple of bizarre injuries to the opposing team disrupted the Nun flow,
As they sought to land the final blow.
Some circumstances were quite silly,
Especially as we were clearly not counting mississippi-ly!
But in the final analysis,
Nobody suffered a quality paralysis.
Another victory hailed.
But congrats to both sides
For a game that was a hell of a ride.
The Man of the Match was Laura,
As she had chased the ball to every border.
So Nuns, please pity me;
She’s been going on about it f****** constantly.
NUNS 65-44 ARK
Your match report was bought to you courtesy of Capital Mens